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An open letter to Isaac Newton

Dear Mr. Newton

First off, take a minute to realise that every teenager in every country on every planet is cursing you at this very moment.
Some because of the 23-year old who conceptualised calculus and integrated hell on so many levels.
Some because of 40-something guy who wrote 3 laws and created enough material to torture young souls from when they are 13 to when they are 30.

Many adults are also cussing at you… Because they realised they spent their teenage years learning calculus and physics for nought. NO ONE GIVES A DAMN HOW THE FRICKING DIFFERENTIAL EQUATIONS PAN OUT!!

I’m sure you are already surrounded by loads of physicists wondering why you left the world with so many ideas that made their lives hell. Why you debunked so many myths. And why you just couldn’t stop your brain from running from one idea to another preventing so many other physicists from making their own discoveries. “You attention hogger” seems like a kind way to put it. All your inventions and ideas may not keep you from taking a beating at their hands (unless you take a book out of Hawking’s theory and displace yourself to another universe where you didn’t do all this stuff. Oh wait. You can’t.)

Now that you’re totally in a mood to trash this letter… Take a moment and pat yourself for the many beautiful things you have left us with. A telescope to look up to the stars. The reason why the pretty rainbow is so. The reason why lightning and thunder go hand in hand… But not ear in ear. You had your hands in so many pies and left us something wonderful to remember you by in so many fields.

I’ve had my fair share of dissing you. For so many years. And am now at the age that I respect what you must have invested to leave all this behind for us.

Thank you.

Now gth. Not really. But kinda.


P. S. As I wrote this I oscillated between extremely enraged and totally thankful. So I started enraged and ended thankful. And then enraged. And then thankful. Kinda summed up it well yes?

Tell me who you write a letter to? And why? And if you want to add a few words to Newton… Comment!